aidan7777
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Post by aidan7777 on Oct 30, 2015 0:33:02 GMT -9
IT'S HERE
THE WORST FANFICTION ON THE FORUM IS BACK
GET READY FOR silly fanfiction 4 REVIEWS BY THE CRITIC PEOPEL
"not again!!!" -most people who find out that there's another chapter
"good shit" -anybody who likes these (they need to get their head checked)
"boooooooooooooooooo!" -the crowd
"YOU DID NOT GEIF ME AMERICA IN THE LAST ONE THERE WAS NO GUNZ AND CHEEZBORGER WAAAA" -americans
"have you tried turning it off and on again?" -the IT crowd
"okay that'll be 999999999999.99 dollars please" -the pizza man
"beat it!" -micheal jackson
"cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries cries" -meth the meloetta
"mmmphh!" -that annoying cow in my paddock which i just taped the muzzle shut and now it is not annoying anymore
"don't think about guns don't think about gu- auuugh! now i can't think of anything but guns! i'll be in my bunk" -marissa
"nanj says something in the third person!" -nanj
"OWWWWWW who put that pin there!!!!" -micheal jackson again
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aidan7777
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Post by aidan7777 on Oct 30, 2015 4:54:55 GMT -9
CHAPTER 1: MEET BILL
(WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING TRIGGER WARNING WARNING this chapter contains mariachis in it and if you get triggered by mariachis don't read my damn fanfiction you goat milker)
so that stupid scenario with the stupid admins going to their stupid school in their stupid ox wagon pulled by their stupid oxen team on a stupid adventure was getting old already i mean i milked that scenario for 3 fucking fanfics in a row lets try something new and sillier shall we?
MEET BILL she is a gardevoir (zip up your pants you perv!!!!!) and WOW SHE LOOKS ORDINARY her eyes are red but have blue but not but they have green but not but yeah but no but yeah and they're big but elegant ah fuck it her eyes are regular eyes and her hands ehhh they're just normal fucking hands they're good for doing things (among other things) and other stuff i guess and her body looks very very ordinary cmon man this girl is not fanservice (so get your hand off it you wanker) and if you ask why she's called bill shut up you dutch bag i am the author and you are not so learn your place you bad idiot anyway
WELCOME TO THE FANFICTION THE YEAR IS twentyfifteen (the way idiots pronounce it) AND THERE'S A LOT OF SHIT TO MAKE FUN OF IN THIS YEAR OK 3 2 1 HERE COMES THE FANFIC BRACE YORUSELSF
so bill the gardevoir was walking down the foot path and then some FUCKING IDIOT CHARITY MAN WENT UP TO HER AND SAID "hello missers would you like to donate to the legalise public execution charity" then she said "jesus fuck no" and kept walking along but then she found a PENNY and said "oh my god a penny" but then abraham lincoln on the penny said "fuck you bill" and bill said "grrrr i hate you abraham lincoln" and THREW THE PENNY ON THE EMPIRE STATE BUILDING AND IT BLEW UP BOOOMMMMM OMG ITS 911 AGAIN but nobody in the city gave a shit because we've seen these stupid dramas before who cares about america so she kept walking and a charizard looked at her and went "say baby do you want to go bedroom" then bill said "jesus fuck no leisure suit larry you make me regret being straight" then her nose bleedened but IT TURNS OUT THAT OBAMA WAS USING HIS OBAMA POWER TO GIVE EVERYONE NOSEBLEEDS THANKS OBAMA then bill said "damnit obama thanks obama" and went to him and hit him in his obama nose and he turned into a llama and died rip so she decided that the city sucked but then she saw a duck lip selfie girl taking selfies and she was walking towards the unfinished bit of the baseplate oh no!!! so she said "no no no get off your iphone you're gonna fall off the edge of the map" but then the selfie girl just said "oh emm gee fuck u thot" and she kept walking and fell off the edge of the baseplate and made a "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" and died rip rip so bill went "oh well darwanin evolushun i guess" so then JESU CRISTO she walked on the water to the not-city bit of the map and obamas cousin osama was walking and then a dog peed on his pants "a dog is peeing on my pants" said osama while a dog was peeing on his pants so then he turned the dog into a bomb and put it into the city toilet and flushed it and then the city blew up booommmmmmm!!! rip rip rip so then bill went "oh well" and walked down the dirt track then she saw 8 eevees in a pile and went "jesus fuck are you doing what i think you're doing" and picked up a rock and then roman came and went "HEY LETS GO BOWLING" so then bowling music started playing and roman threw his bowling ball at the eevees and KNOCKED THEM ALL OVER THATS A STRIKE but then the bowling ball flew back and hit him on the head and he died rip rip rip rip so bill said "what the fuck is wrong with this game" and continued her stupid walk along the stupid path for this stupid story but then MARIACHIS CAME AND STARTED MAKING EVERYONES EARS BLEED WITH THEIR GUITAR-ING PLAYERINGIERING and bill went "auuugh this is like listening to justin beiber somebody help" so arceus the soup-er hero came and went "its me arceus the hobo stupor hero" but then the mariachis went "HOLA" and jumped on him and played mariachi music into him and arceus went "noooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" and got filled up with mariachi music and exploded rip rip rip rip rip then the mariachis kept making everyones ears bleed but bill just walked away on the stupid path
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Post by Masked on Oct 30, 2015 7:21:36 GMT -9
obama is confirmed fanservice
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Post by Deleted on Oct 30, 2015 10:41:35 GMT -9
obama is confirmed fanservice "O-Obama-kun! N-not there...! Ngh....O-Obama-kun..." aidan i strongly recommend making an obama x everybody here fanfiction
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aidan7777
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Post by aidan7777 on Nov 3, 2015 0:36:18 GMT -9
CHAPTER 2: DONALD TRUMP TRUMPS THE BAD MAN so i was typing along minding my own business writing the fanfic and making your eyes bleed with the lack of formatting when suddenly i see the light come on "SERVICE FANS SOON" it says and i look at big light on the keyboard and i think "oh no if i dont do this my computer will stop working and go to the retirement home" so now i have to bloody service you stupid fans alright here's your idiot fanservice for your idiot brains i hope you're happy stupid god damn it you guys need so much servicing ok so bill is still walking along the track she's an aimlessly wandering gardevoir trying to walk to the restaurant at the end of the universe (she heard it has good reviews) and then she saw an egg which went "MAMA MAMA MAMA MAMAMAMAMAMA" then she said "what the fuck no just because i'm a gardevoir doesn't mean i'm your mother go away dutch bag" and then she used her psychic power to kill the egg rip (one of the many uses for psychic powers among other things) so she smiled and then she saw a broken desk fan so she dialed 0118 999 881 999 119 7253 and called the engineer and then the engineer came and fixed the fan THERE'S YOUR STUPID FAN SERVICE I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY so she smiled and did the safety dance and walked while doing the safety dance and then there was donald trump and the DESTROY guy donald trump said "hey destroy guy have a cigar" destroy guy replyerd "thanks" and lit the cigar then BOOMMMMM the cigar blew up it was an exploding cigar like the one in the cartoon and they both laughered then bill said to the suit wearerers " hey that was good im going to the restaurant at the end of the universe do you want to come i heard they trump the competition" then DESTROY guy replidered "ok only if they have candy" and donald trump talked "you had me at trump" so then DONALD TRUMP AND DESTROY GUY JOINED THE PARTY WOO FUCKING HOO so they kept walking down the road BUT OH NO they met some stupid edgy OC's who turned to them and went "my life is pain i listen to slipnot and effervescent boo hoo weepy weepy sad red and black and suicide waaa" so they all went "boooooooooo!" and stole their skateboards which made the even sadder so then they were TOTALLY KOOL AND THEY WERE DOING KOOL SK8ing TRICKS WHOAAAAAA DESTROY GUY DID A SICK OLLIE AND THEN DID A COOL RAIL SLIDE ON OSAMA BIN LADENS BEARD AND THEN DONALD TRUMP OLLIED OVER THE STATUE OF LIBERTY WHOOAAAAA meanwhile BAD GUY MICHEAL BAY was in his office he was going "muhahahhahaha im going to ruin a franchise by releasing another bad movie and i'll get rich with all the explosions maahahahahahha!" but THEN BILL THE GARDEVOIR AND DONALD TRUMP AND DESTROY GUY OLLIED INTO HIS OFFICE micheal bay went "what the duck" THEN THEY SKATED IN HIS OFFICE AND THE DESTROY GUY DESTROYED HIS OSCAR AWARDS WHILE BILL THE GARDEVOIR TOOK HIS MOVIE AND PUT IT ON THE GROUND WHERE DONALD TRUMP TRUMPED ON IT WITH HIS SHOE AND THEN SHE PICKED IT BACK UP AND PUT IT IN A BLENDER AND MADE IT INTO A MOVIE SMOOTHIE micheal bay went "NOO NO NO NO NO NOOOOO NOOO MY BEAUTIFUL MOVIE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" and he was crying like a bad movie director and they all high fived and sk8ed out of the office while doing super kool sk8 tricks m8 "oh god i've been at this for 3 hours please send help im serious i need a box of tissues and some new sheets help aaaaaaaaaaaa" -marissa
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aidan7777
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Post by aidan7777 on Nov 4, 2015 3:25:41 GMT -9
CHAPTER 3: BIG SKATE BATTLE WITH OBAMA IN IT
SO THE THREE TOTALLY COOL AND TOTALLY RADICAL DUDES DESTROY GUY DONALD TRUMP DESTROY GUY AND THE ONE CHICK BILL THE GARDEVOIR WERE SKATING DOWN THE STREET THEY WERE DOING OLLIES ALL OVER THE PLACE AND DOING RAIL SLIDES ON PEOPLES CARS WHO GOT ANGRY BUT THEY DIDN'T CARE THEY DID RAIL SLIDES ON BENCHES AND THEY RAN OVER PIGEONS RIP RIP RIP DESTROY guy said "hey this is cool skating is the best i am so cool" then donald trump said "we're TRUMPING THE STREET HERE everything is good as long as obama does not come" BUT THEN OH NO OBAMA CAME ON THE PRESIDENTIAL SKATEBOARD AND WENT "hi im the president i challenge you to a skate off you goat milker presidential canidates the winner will be the president i am still the president blahhhhh" then bill went "HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" SO THEN IT WAS ON 3 2 1 GO obama did a cool ollie over the white house but then donald trump blew a rasberry and ollied OVER THE TWIN TOWERS but that wasn't very impressive since the twin towers are just a pile of rubble booo so then bill OLLIED OVER THE EIFFEL TOWER WHOAAAAA and then the dogs and the people in france dropped their baguettes and got out of their citroen 2cv cars and applauded because it was very french justice OK BACK TO SKATE BATTLE obama was winning the skate battle and then HIS SHIRT DISAPPEARED AND HE WAS SHIRTLESS AND THEN HE WAS USING HIS OBAMA POWERS AND EVERYBODY NOSEBLEEDED THANKS OBAMA AND BILL WENT "augh not again" and donald trump said "i'll trump you for this you goat milker" BUT a stupid idiot smelly anime schoolboy was on the road and he nosebled and the nose blood got on the road and obama went "OH NO" and his skateboard slipped on the nose blood and he was spinning out going "no no no no no no no no no no" then BANG DING OW he went in the trash can and ended up being smelly and went "damn!!!" so then they were all the president and then they spent all the government budget on funding stupid shit like party supplies and america went broke and died rip then bear grills came and hi im bare grills then DESTROY guy said "you're only wearing a speedo" donald trump went "hence bare heuheuheuheuheuheuheheu" but then OH NO HE FILLED THE WHITE HOUSE WITH PISS AND THE WHITE HOUSE DIED and bill went "jesus fuck" and bare bare gills went "piss" and thew a pointy lawn flamingo at bill and it hit her and she went "augh right in the nipple" SO THEN THEY TRIED TO GO AT THEIR PRESIDENT LIMO CAR TO GET AWAY BUT IT TURNS OUT BEAR GRILLS FILLED THAT UP WITH PISS TOO so then bill went "augh the car" and so then they got back on their skateboards but some idiot had sawed the wheels off so they wouldn't work omg no!!! then bear grills went "im going to fill you with piss" then DESTROY guy went "wait hold on" and he bought a doctor from the doctor store and he put it with bear grills and the doctor fixed bear grills so he doesn't piss so much anymore and he went "oh nOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" and kept going "NOOOOOOO" for so long that he run out of breathe and then doctor who the doctor said "well i guess we left him" then he put badly drawn ms paint sunglasses on and said "breathless"
YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
"ugh think about bad stuff think about nazi germany the gas chambers the smoke stacks ADOLF HITLER SHIRTLESS NO OH GOD HERE I GO AGAIN I STILL DON'T HAVE TISSUES OR A CHANGE OF SHEETS I CANT STOP HELPPPPP" -marissa
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aidan7777
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Post by aidan7777 on Nov 5, 2015 6:21:50 GMT -9
CHAPTER 4: NANJ NEWS
"oh god that was so good hitler is such a beautiful looking man he is ripped i think i might be finally done for the night aand- oh my good gosh why are you all here" -marissa
everybody was there
they saw everything
there was doctor who there and bill and donald trump and DESTROY guy and anju and BOB HIKER and arin and ivy and time and tommy wiseau then marissa said "oh god and you didn't give me tissues at all whyyyy" and tommy wiseau said "i recorded EVERYTHING AHAHAHAHAHAHA" and marissa went "OMG TOMMY WISEAU NO" THEN REPORTER NANJ WAS ON THE SCENE AND NEWS REPORTER MAN NANJ WENT "hi im nanj im live on the scene!!! marissa's going on the news!!!" and marissa went "AUGGGH NO" AND THEN SHE WAS ON THE NEWS AND EVERYBODY IN THE WORLD SAW THE NEWS AND THEY ALL WENT "HUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUE" LIKE BEAVIS AND BUTT HEAD AND THEN TOMMY WISEAU SHOWED THEM THE TAPE HE RECORDED EVERYTHING AND THEY ALL LAUGHED AND MARISSA WENT "GOD DAMN IT I DO THE ONLY PRODUCTIVE THING I CAN DO WHEN I'M ALONE AND THIS HAPPENS J-J-J-J-J-J-JESUS CHRIST" AND JESUS WAS WATCHING TOO AND HE WENT "LOL" AND HE SENT IT ON TWITTER TO ALL HIS FOLLOWERS marissa went "aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" so they all walkered out and they were laughening and marissa went "god donut now what will i do maybe the same as i was doing actually no thats kinda boring now ah i know i'll do something better" so then she reached into her bedside drawer and took out a gameboy and inserted a tetris cartridge into her nose and died RIP AND THAT WENT ON THE NEWS TOO TOMMY WISEAU RECORDED IT AS WELL
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